Wham

Where did that come from? I have been feeling well, energy levels dependable, slight tightness in the throat. Suddenly today, after teaching two morning music theory sections about finding music analyses, my whole body is exhausted. I try to move, and it feels like I am pushing through wet cement. It take Hurculean efforts to walk, to pick up things, to breathe. I don't understand. Nothing has changed.

Except for my neck. Where I used to have a chin, there seems only to be swollen glands that make my throat tight and achy. This will not do. I was scheduled for another test Monday (cardio stress based on potential heart damage from the chemo - just checking) but they cancelled it because the insurance company has not approved it yet. Just as well. I'm pretty sure I would flunk at this rate.

Good thing Drew is at the Robotics meet. I came home from work and collapsed in the easy chair, too tired to even eat. I have had bouts of tiredness before, but this is over the edge. I'm sure it will pass. These things always do. Fortunately I don't have anything heavy scheduled for tomorrow - just preparing for PrayerSong rehearsal. And the inevitable housework. But I can't think about that tonight. Tonight I stare at the TV blaring away about I don't know what, and try to help my body relax and rest. Chamomile tea, warm applesauce, heating pad, and lots and lots of pillows.

If I can relax enough to sleep, I am sure tomorrow will be better. President Bush said when he can't sleep, he calls the White House pianist who comes and plays lullabies. And that's what PrayerSong is doing for cancer patients. So I will take a bit of my own medicine and put on a lullaby CD, followed by my favorite piano music (Chopin, Liszt, Rachmaninoff, Tchaikovsky, Brahms. . .). I spray some herbal sleepytime aroma (made by a friend of mine from Connecticut) on my pillow, and sink down for the night. Sigh. Some days are just this way.