Driving to Wisconsin

Here we go again. The butterflies in my tummy, the knot in my brain, the angst at having to leave the safety of my sister's place and drive alone to Wisconsin. I thought perhaps I had gotten over the ridiculous and unfounded fears, but, no. It is not as bad, but I am kibitzing about leaving. Something nags at the back of my brain.

I ask Deb to help me check my oil. Kiel wasn't sure when I left home where the level was. Deb looks. She can't tell. She suggests we go to Valvoline where she has her car taken care of. The first mechanic thinks the level is fine. The second mechanic looks and laughs. I am low. He adds the necessary fluid, then, on finding out that I am driving to Wisconsin, checks all the other levels too.

He overinflates my tires a tad, explaining that with the high heat index (105 degrees), its best to do that. He warns me not to speed. Take it easy and you may avoid a tire giving out. I heed his warning and finally bid farewell to Deb and John and with some trepidation, begin the long trek. I am still somewhat ill at ease.

The heat does not help. My arm is burning through the window glass no matter how I try to keep it out of the sun's reach. Every few miles, I see a car pulled to the side of the road, broken down, many with flat tires. AAA must be maxed. Dear God, please be with me and keep me safe. I putz along at barely 65, cars whizzing by. I do not care.

It feels as if I am suspended in time, making precious little progress. At this rate, I will likely find a hotel room for the night and finish the drive in the morning. I pray as I drive along. Traffic slows to a crawl for agonizing miles. An RV is pulled to the side, disabled. Traffic opens up. And with it my heart. Suddenly the unreasonable fear is gone. I do not know why. But I am relieved. Perhaps it just took awhile for me to adjust or process whatever fear was driving my anxiety. Perhaps I have once again come to realize that God is watching over me and all will be well.

All at once I was surprised to find myself in the middle of a windmill farm. Hundreds and hundreds of modern shiny metal windmills dotted the scenery in every direction. Not one of them was turning, but they sure looked impressive, giants protecting the land. Very cool. Who knew such a thing existed as a windmill farm?

I could almost feel my blood pressure lowering. The air began to cool. I stopped for gas, then decided to drive until I was too tired. Lo and behold, I drove on into the night until I reached Concordia somewhere around 11:30, called security to awaken the RA and trucked my stuff down the familiar dorm hallway to my suite. I asked for a single room and they awarded me an entire suite!

I unpack quietly, then roll out my sleeping bag (dorm mattresses are notoriously lumpy) and settle in for some much needed rest. Tomorrow I will plunge into my final class in my Master of Church Music program. It is good to be moving forward once again. I close my eyes and smile at the sound of the crickets chirruping. Sleep comes easily here on the shores of Lake Michigan and on the peace filled convent turned campus.