Retreat

What an odd word, so packed with connotations. Militarily, it can mean a momentary withdrawing from the battle. Verbally, it refers to a repetition of something pleasant - to be treated again. Every year the Seminary holds its annual retreat as a time for the entire community to gather together in a place aside from life's hurry scurry and engage in an intentional look at how we are doing in life. It encompasses both meanings - a withdrawing and a treat to be enjoyed again.

They follow a three year cycle, focusing on Intimacy with God the first year, Intimacy with Self the second year, Intimacy with Others the third year. This year we explored intimacy (in-to-me-see) with others, learning to be caring and loving even to the uncaring and hateful. Our speaker, Susan Muto, wove into her meditations the words of Scripture, ancient writers, modern writers in a seamless fabric of thoughtful insights. We heard from the hearts of, among others, Therese of Lisieux, Adrian van Kaam, Luke, Matthew, John, Mark, and Dag Hammarskjold.

Built into the program were intentional times of silence. We were not to speak to others, but to find a quiet place to simply be silent, to meditate on what we were hearing, to listen to God. It all sounds very serious and studious. Coupled with the agenda was the location - the Salvation Army Camp is located in a remote and natural setting on the shores of Lake Geneva. The "dorms" are really barracks, and there is a certain element of communal 'roughing it' built in.

What was it really, underneath all the planning and contriving and intention? Did we experience a treat? A respite from life's pressures? For many, adding one more activity into an already overcrowded schedule was no treat. The additional hours of planning and working ahead to stay on top of papers and family responsibilities was daunting. The inconveniences and discomforts of lumpy squeaky beds and cold rooms caused aches and pains and sleep deprivation although we certainly got to know each other better!

Two threads ran through the fabric of the weekend. One was an encouragement to find God in every task of life, no matter how demeaning or disgusting it might be. Those who saw through God's eyes and took the higher road accomplished much worth noting, showing us how to care for others at the deepest level. Such was Therese. Her motto could have been "It's not about me."

The second aspect was about how counter cultural it is to live for Christ. Not being focused on one's self flies in the face of the American lifestyle. How far short of the mark I fall! I spend too much energy drawing lines in the proverbial sand so that I do not get taken advantage of. I had a friend who once told me that no one is able to love perfectly, so we might as well be truthful about what we can tolerate. No one but Jesus can love perfectly and we are not Jesus, so don't even try to love the horrible.

Which is true - except that we can learn to let Jesus love through us, doing what we cannot do on our own as we let him work. And THAT is far from easy. I have come to the conclusion that it is important to step aside on a regular basis and take your spiritual pulse. You have to see if you are still on the right path. The treat was seeing the standard clearly identified, seeing that there have been those who have progressed farther down that road than I, knowing that its still possible to be more like Christ. Much to think about.