Bit of Paranoia

I debated whether to attend church today even though the choir will not begin until next Sunday. In fact, I had seriously thought of going just to see how much it takes energy wise and whether I am up to it.



Two things stopped me. First, several people from church mentioned that they have had a bad virus and have been lying low. That right there was enough to give me pause. Second, I have had a leaky nose and a cough myself. I don't know what is causing it. There is no fever or phlegm, but it does tire me out and I know my immune system is not quite full strength yet.



I am hoping this is just a fall allergy kind of thing. But I feel like I am still a bit fragile, and find myself washing my hands often and being ever so careful about where I go. I would hate to trip myself up now! I do realize that I can't stay isolated forever. At some point I have to get on with life. But knowing just where the line is, that's the trick.



In a few months, I am sure things will be back to normal, if there is such a thing. But right now, I try to allow my paranoia to balance my drive so that I maintain some sort of rational stasis!