First WW Goal

5 lbs. Hard won, I have to say. Even with a chemo slid in there (of course, the steroids work against losing weight). But nevertheless, I am down 5 pounds and I will try to keep it off and keep the scale's needle heading in the downward direction.

Of late, the mental battle is no longer about how deserving I am to be pampered. It is more about convincing myself that I am not hungry. I admit to feeling sorry for myself. After all, everyone else can eat as many raw fruits and vegetables as they want to stave off their hunger while I cannot. I have no PowerFoods on which to rely because if I were to eat a lot of that kind of food, I would do myself in.

I have a good excuse to quit. Or at least, that is what I tell myself. And yet. I am going with my friend, and she is relying on me to hang in there with her. Sigh. Deep down I know the wisdom of continuing to eat wisely and more frugally. I didn't become a blimp in a day, and I will not get over it easily either.

Then I slide down the "if only" side of the ladder. If only I could exercise like these other women do, I would lose weight faster, feel like I am making better progress, be encouraged. But my body is too worn out by all the medical treatments and I can't handle all that running. It's a valid suggestion, but there are ways to overcome such limitations.

The bottom line is that it doesn't matter how much progress everyone else is making or how many obstacles I encounter in reaching my goal. What matters is that I continue to focus on the goal of getting healthier by eating less and eating better quality food. Not pushing the limits and making myself sick, but learning how to slowly and steadily improve my situation.

OK. Pep talk over. Now back to work.