Today Mom turns 81. Not quite the same landmark as last year's big eight-o celebration. In fact Mom asked us not to make a fuss. She didn't want gifts or calls or cards and especially no flowers. She is not feeling up to it and is still struggling with just getting around.
Of course, we will respect her wishes, but we love her. While I am able to let the day go without talking to her, I do connect with my sisters who are with her this week. They have decided Mom should spend the winter in Tennessee with my sister the doctor who can oversee her recovery best. They will make the trip in Mom's car, wistfully named the QE2 (because it is as big as a boat!).
So they will be coming my way tomorrow on the first leg of their journey. I will give Mom her present then and sing her a happy birthday. I searched around to find the warmest, cuddliest, yellowest blanket I could find. Something to brighten her day, remind her that the sun will shine again, and that I wrap her in prayers and wishes for recovery every day.
They boys sign the card. I tuck in a small bag of M&M's and dub them energy pills with instructions to take one whenever she feels tired. Perhaps the small infusions of sugar and caffeine will help make the trip more tolerable.
I retire this evening in prayer for Mom. This is not easy, facing a challenge with out the man who has been part of your life for decades. Learning how to navigate on your own is never something you want to have to do. We all go through it, even if it is learning to live on your own and not home with your parents. But just knowing that its a common experience does not make it any easier to get through.
Hang in there, Mom. Next year this time will be less painful, and the year after, though you will still miss him, it will hurt a lot less. Then maybe we can start celebrating your birthday again. With presents and cake and everything. Happy Birthday anyway.
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