These days I find I have to get about ten hours of sleep. If I expect to be able to go to work, I have to hit the sheets early. Somewhere around 8:00 pm I start wrapping it up, brush my teeth, wriggle into my nightgown, fill the hotwater bottle, and fall exhausted into bed.
I sleep soundly for at least three or four hours, after which any noise the boys are still producing wakes me momentarily. I am grumpy if awakened, and grouse out loud about reasonable behavior of students and getting lights out and being quiet.
It is an unnatural sleep. Dreams are weird if realistic and leave one trying to remember if things really happened or if they were only figments of chemo / radiation induced coma sleeping. Sometimes I find myself dreaming that I am going to the bathroom only to awaken and find that I have. Rats.
This is not a reversion to baby days. If it were, I would be able to take short naps throughout the day. But I cannot. Sometimes my muscles cramp so hard I am jerked out of a deep sleep and have to jump to an upright position to keep my legs from spasming.
It is just a phase, I tell myself. Another wrinkle of recovery. It will eventually calm down. No need to rush out and get more Pampers. I will be glad when it passes. I would hate to think that I will waste so much time sleeping for the rest of my time here on God's green earth!
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